Its All About Jokes

. . . your girlfriend thinks you‘re a real gentleman because you only scratch your crotch while playing softball. (from JCol641202)

. . . you stop picking your nose in traffic long enough to wink at the girl next to you. (from JCol641202)

. . . you found your wife‘s christmas present along side the road. (from JCol641202)

. . . you think the Roman Empire has somthing to do with a cell phone. (from JCol641202)

. . . your mother kicked you out of the house because you pawned her favorite chainsaw to buy a deer tag. (from JCol641202)

. . . you have to keep a step ladder handy to open your truck door for your girlfrend. (from JCol641202)

. . . you ever been rushed to the emergency room because you swallowed your redman. (from JCol641202)

. . . your daughter gets married before you do. (from MojoDncr)

. . . when finally mowing your lawn, you find an engine block you didn‘t know was there. (from MojoDncr)

. . . you have the bail bondsman on speed dial. (from MojoDncr)

. . . you think the “Nutcracker“ is something you do on the diving board. (from MojoDncr)

. . . your excuse for missing your oldest sons grauation is, “Hell woman, you think the crappie bite like this all year?“ (from JCol641202)

. . . you hear somone mention the depression and you think they are talking about when Bubba‘s Market ran out of Skoal. (from JCol641202)

. . . you just hate getting strip searched by the guard every time you go visit your cousin Bubba. (from JCol641202)

. . . you‘ve ever asked an Amish guy on a horse and buggy if he thought he could out run your John Deer. (from JCol641202)

. . . you‘ve ever asked a priest why he‘s wearing that sissy turtleneck. (from JCol641202)

. . . your favorite event at a wedding is the spittin‘ contest. (from JCol641202)

. . . your momma makes two turkeys for Thanksgiving, one for the family and the other for the dogs. (from JCol641202)

. . . you have to camofladge your best crops when a helicopter flies over. (from JCol641202)

. . . your mother always said keep your nose clean and from this day on you pick your nose. (from Cheesyd13)

. . . you cook perogies in beer. (from Stan Konkel)

. . . you and your best friend paint flames on your car and it looks better. (from Stan Konkel)

. . . you‘ve ever returned bottles so you could buy beer with the deposit money. (from Stan Konkel)

. . . your ashtray is too full, so you use the floor. (from Stan Konkel)

. . . you use a gas can to fill up your pick up truck. (from bdk)

. . . you use dental floss to restring your banjo. (from bdk)

. . . you have a trophy from a tractor pull. (from bdk)

. . . your favorite song has the name of a truck company in it. (from bdk)

. . . you have to climb the town‘s water tower to save your sister‘s honor. (from Nan)

. . . you and your dad walk to school together because you are in the same grade. (from Nan)

. . . your dad plays “the pull my finger“ joke at family gatherings. (from Nan)

. . . you have more deer heads on your wall than family portraits. (from Russell)

. . . you go to a bar to cheer on your mother in mud wrestling. (from Russell)

. . . your pillow case doubles as your bowling bag. (from Russell)

. . . you keep your fingernails long to open you snuff can. (from Russell)

. . . you think the internet is something you use fishing. (from Russell)

. . . you have more insurance on your hunting dog than you do on your house. (from Russell)

. . . when someone asks to see your kids you show them the goats. (from Russell)

. . . you have to take out a loan to pay off the tire store. (from Russell)

. . . you ever shot a deer with a tater gun. (from Russell)

. . . you have ever worn camo to a funeral. (from Russell)