Its All About Jokes

‘history of poem
(U.E.T main admissin huwa
to mairi Bantoo nay kaha
ab to paristaan ja rahay ho
suna hay wahan paryaan hi paryaan hoti hai
yahan poncha to paryaan kia milni thin
kuch ajeeb hi makhlooq har taraf dikhai di
bharhal is main Alla Rakhi sab say mufarid cheez thi
ab main nay apni Bantoo ko kuch youn likha)
university main apni, parhti ik Alla Rakhi hay
kahtay hain bari dil wali hay
chaal us ki niraali hay
aankh us ki ghazali hay
kanoon main aisi baali hay
jaisay flopy disc laga li hay
aankh kajal say khali hay
coloured lenz nay jaga li hay
khulay baaloon main khushboo laga li hay
jaisay sahira koi bangali hay
dopattay ki bajay ik jaali hay
kaandhay pay jo saja li hay
aur mun main chewingum ki jugali hay
koi bhi period jo khali hay
to library nay KFC ki jaga li hay
aur dating aasan bana li hay
3310 main SIM dalwa li hay
aur raat ko bhi gup laga li hay
aur aik nai reet nikali hay
kabhi Mooda is phool ka maali hay
to kbhi Sheeday say yaari laga li hay
chahay Arbi hay chahay Nepali hay
har ik ki neend ura li hay
alla rakhi nirali hay

yeh aaj kal ki lerkian bhi kia ajeb filmhoti hain
apni asal shakel chhupa ker upper se fair cream hoti hain

pehle pehle apne leye koi lerka fine dhondti hain
phir aahista aahista usse line deti hain

jab koi masoom bechare unse set hote hain
tu na poochho inke kitne waray niaray hote hain

tum sab se alag ho tum se kehti hain
kion keh pehle hazaroon se mil chuki hoti hain

mujhe tumhari fiker horahi thi tumne khana khaya phone per poochhti hain
or khud haath main cold drink or bryani leker bethi hoti hain

jab koi takreeb ho to beauty parloure jati hain
or us ka bill tumhari jeb se bherwati hain

sonay ki balian or mobile phone in ki chahat hoti hai
beta! apne kapre bhi givi rekhwado yeh lerkian aesi hi hoti hain

jab tum saath ho to dunia jahan ka pyar jatati hain
or apne dil main tum ko ullo gadha pukarti hain

bhaion yeh lerkian door hi se achhi legti hain
in ke pass jao tu lomri ki si lagti hain

A little boy asked his mother,

‘Why are you crying?‘

‘Because I‘m a woman‘, she told him.

‘I don‘t understand,‘ he said.

His mom just hugged him and said,

‘And you never will‘.

Later the little boy asked his father,

‘Why does mother seem to cry

for no reason?‘

‘All women cry for no reason‘

was all his dad could say.

The little boy grew up and became a man,

still wondering why women cry.

Finally He put in a call to GOD; when

GOD got on the phone, the man asked,

‘GOD, why do women cry so easily?‘

GOD said, ‘When I made woman she

had to be special. I made her shoulders

strong enough to carry the weight of the

world; yet gentle enough to give comfort.

I gave her an inner strength to endure

childbirth and the rejection that many

times comes from her children.

I gave her a hardness that allows her to

keep going when everyone else gives

up and take care of her family through

sickness and fatigue without complaining.

I gave her sensitivity to love her children

under any and all circumstances, even

when her child has hurt her badly.

This same sensitivity helps her make a child‘s

boo-boo feel better and share in her

teenagers anxieties and fears.

I gave her strength to carry her husband

through his faults and fashioned her from

his rib to protect his heart.

I gave her wisdom to know that a good

husband never hurts his wife, but sometimes

test her strengths and her resolve to stand

beside him unfalteringly.

And finally, I gave her a tear to shed.

This is hers exclusively to use whenever

it is needed.‘ ‘The beauty of a woman

in not in her clothes she wears, the figure

that she carries, or the way she combs

her hair. The beauty of a woman must be

seen in her eyes, because that is the

doorway to her heart, the place

where love resides.‘

larkian kia hain balain hain aaaj kal ki larkian
kia hain ab hum kia batain aaj kal ki larkian

lab in kay sorkh hain hontoon pay angraize bi hay
chaal main jado bi hay tofan ki taize be hay

par laga kay ur na jain aaj kal ki larkian
maa ko woo mami kahain dadi kahain woo baap ko

ainay main soo dafa daikhain woo apnay aap ko
khod paya ashiq hoo na jain aaj kal ki larkian

daikho woo tai lagain pehnai woo patloon be
or ager chahain to ker saktee hain telefone be

raat bhar piano pay gain aaj kal ki larkian
thank u kahtee nahi jab bus main un ko seet do

dil ya chahay wahain in ko pakar kay peet do
nokree to milee nahi apni to omar kat gai

office main akay zalim korsioon pay daat gai
lain hamaree baddoain aaj kal ki larkian

jain picknick gardan sona ker kay apna ghar
kia karian choolay safaie sayonay lagtta hay daar

khana bhi bagoon main khain aaj kal ki larkian
on kay sir per on ki jhoote togmat ka taag nahi

aisay akrain jaisay sheher main inee ka raaj hay
ab governar ban na gain aaj kal ki larkian

machar nay kata kion k us ko janoon tha
machi aisay kharish k dil basakoon tha
machar ko ham nay pakra laikin phir chor dia
kambakhat ki ragoon main apna hi khoon tha

Dabbay may dabba dabbay may khargosh
Nana nay aankh mari nani behosh

Khuda karay sab haseenaao ke baap mar jaeen
Maut ka bahana ho aur hum in kay ghar jaeen

Ishq kay samander main ghota lagaya
Pani both thanda tha main bahar nikal aya

neend mujhey raat bhar aati hai kam
shayad macharon ko bi mil gaya hai sanam
har pal mein sochta hon tum ko
kia karon koi aur kaam jo nehi hum ko

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mein chahta hon tum koiss qadar
koi aur mil jaey tu dekhon naa mur kar

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tujh bin zindagi ka tasawar hi nehi hai
tere sang ho zindagi aisa bi koi scene nehi hai

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mohabbat hai mujh ko sirf tum sey sanam
sach keh raha hon mein tumhari qasam

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jhot mein agar kahon tu, tu mar jaey
a kash mujh ko aishwarya mil jaey

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iss dunya mein, tum he sab sey haseen ho
mein aur kahon jhot kitna, ke tum ko yaqeen ho

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bas tere he sang jo meri zindagi
acha nehi ke mein kar lo khudhkoshi

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rooz khawab mein nazar aatey ho tum
kio mujhey neend mein bi daratay ho tum

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ab tu tere bin jeena ho gaya hai mushkil
haan ghar ke liye chahiye nokrani mustakil

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dekho mujhey hai kitna pyar tum sey, ab tu haan karo
agar ab bi hai inkaar tu yeh letter agay pass karo

Lamha lamha waqt guzar jayega,
Chand lamho mein exam aa jayega.
Abhi bhi waqt hai thoda padh lo,
Warna pass kya Munna Bhai Karwayega

Badalo ke sath jab hawa chalti hai…
To mujhe tumhari yaad aati hai.
Aasman mein jab badal garajte hai…
To mujhe tumhari yaad aati hai.
Barsaat jab shuru hoti hai …
To mujhe tumhari yaad aati hai.
……………………………..
Abey mera chata vapas kar.

I want to share everything with u
Your sadness, ur happy moments
Every single second of the day
Let’s start with
Your bank account.

Roses r red,
Voiles r blue,
Monkeys like u,
Should be kept in zoo,
Don’t get angry u’ll find me there too
Not in cage but laughing on u.