Education Jokes Collection

28 Jul

DOES THIS HOMEWORK LOOK FAMILIAR?We professors have a m

DOES THIS HOMEWORK LOOK FAMILIAR?

We professors have a memory for names that is best served in one of the following ways:

Your name is an eponym (you’re named after a famous person or place),
An epiphenomenon process occurred (you told me your name and I remembered it), or
An epistolary action occurred (you wrote your name down on the homework).
Of the three choices, the last is the best because not everyone can be named Abe Lincoln and we have trouble remembering where we put our wallets.

Professor Johnson, 4/19/00, written comments posted on his office door with the suspect homework

28 Jul

When a warming trend hit the Artic, scientists were ass

When a warming trend hit the Artic, scientists were assigned to watch glaciers in danger of splitting. Naturally, all of the researchers had to have good ice sight.

28 Jul

Did you know that verb is a noun?If two mouses are mice

Did you know that ‘verb‘ is a noun?
If two mouses are mice and two louses are lice, why aren‘t two houses hice?
Why is the plural of goose-geese, and not the plural of moose-meese?
There were three tomatoes: a mum, a dad and a son. The son lagged behind and
fell splat on the floor. His dad yelled to him, ‘Ketchup, son.‘

28 Jul

Dad: Hey son what is 2 x 2?Son: A tieDad: Ok, what is 2

Dad: Hey son what is 2 x 2?
Son: A tie
Dad: Ok, what is 2 x 1?
Son: An offer

28 Jul

Today, of course, being college-bred means being a loaf

Today, of course, being college-bred means being a loaf for four years

28 Jul

Why did the nerd eat the fifth graders math test??Becau

Why did the nerd eat the fifth grader‘s math test??
Because it was a peace of cake!!

28 Jul

Going To School…!

Early one mornin‘, a mother went in to wake up her son …

mother : “Wake up, son … Itz time to go to school !“ …

son : “But why, Mom ? .. I don‘ want to go.“ …

mother : “Give me two reasonz, why U don‘ want to go.“ …

son : “Well, da kidz hate me for one, … n da teacherz hate me, too !“ …

mother : “Oh, datz no reason not to go to school .. Come on now n get ready .“ …

son : “Give me two reasonz, why I should go to school.“ …

mother : “Well, for one, u‘re 52 yearz old .. n for another, u‘re da Principal !“ …