28 Jul

Two vampires walked into a bar and called for the barte

Two vampires walked into a bar and called for the bartender. ‘I‘ll have a glass of blood,‘ said one.
‘I‘ll have a glass of plasma,‘ said the other.
‘Okay,‘ replied the bartender, ‘That‘ll be one blood and one blood lite.‘

This grasshopper walks into a bar, and the bartender says, ‘Hey! We have a drink named after you!‘
The grasshopper replies, ‘Really? You have a drink named Steve?!‘

A termite walks into a bar and says, ‘Is the bar tender here?‘

A hamburger walks into a bar, and the bartenders says, ‘I‘m sorry, but we don‘t serve food here.‘

Two hydrogen atoms walk into a bar. One says, ‘I think I‘ve lost an electron.‘
The other says, ‘Are you sure?‘
The first says, ‘Yes, I‘m positive.‘

A neutron walks into a bar. ‘I‘d like a beer,‘ he says. The bartender promptly serves up a beer. ‘How much will that be?‘ asks the neutron.
‘For you?‘ replies the bartender, ‘No charge.‘

A woman walks into a bar and asks for a double entendre… so the barman gave her one!

Two donkeys walk into a bar and the first donkey says to the bartender ‘I‘ll have a pint of Bud please‘
and the second donkey says ‘hee haw, hee haw, he always orders that‘

So two jumper cables walk into a bar. Bartender says, ‘You guys better not start anything in here.‘

A guy walks into a bar and the bartender says to the guy: ‘Mate, you‘ve got a steering wheel down your pants.‘
The guy replies ‘Yeah I know. Its driving me nuts!‘